The Valet (2006): C-

Director(s): Francis Veber. Screenplay: Francis Veber. Cast: Gad Elmaleh, Alice Taglioni, Daniel Auteuil, Kristin Scott Thomas, Richard Berry, Virginie Ledoyen, Dany Boon, Michel Jonasz, Michel Aumont, Laurent Gamelon, Patrick Mille, Michèle Garcia and Philippe Magnan. Distributor: Sony Pictures Classics. Runtime: 83 min. Rating: PG-13.

The Valet lamentably trembles in the shadow of this year's Avenue Montaigne. Both exude an immeasurable amount of pretentiousness that lead up to the each film's demise. Whereas the latter was about following the pathways of love, this one is about uncovering them, as the film's main narrative follows François (Gad Elmaleh), a valet at a shmancy-dancy restaurant, and his journey of ill-fated luck. It all starts when industrialist Pierre (Daniel Auteuil) is photographed with his longtime mistress, fashion-plate Elena (Alice Taglioni); he covers his ass by telling his wife (Kristin Scott Thomas) that the gorgeous blonde was not with him but with the passerby next to them in the tabloid snapshot, that person being François. Aesthetically, The Valet evokes not a single shard of brilliance—everything in the film is blown up to a matter of acute pretension, from the overheated spy-like music to predictable comedic sequences that in the end, muster not a single laugh. Much like Avenue Montaigne, the film lacks nuance, something that brings back the feeling of Hollywood once again. And what the hell is up with that ending? Does one really need yet another laugh?